A New Year Rising

Betwixt and Between

I enjoyed a tranquil Christmas Day, resting in a safe place with a loving family, good food, wine to drink, and gifts to share. I know that I am fortunate to be in such a place and that a myriad of souls suffered inexplicably even as I sat secure. Gratitude flows freely but it is not without its own dark shadows.

betwixt, between

A setting sun on a diminishing year with the dawn of a new trek around our home star elicits a mélange of emotions. Joyful on one hand with the possibilities of new opportunities. But painful on the other, as unremitting psychic clutter weighs me down (even as a humpback whale descends into the depths with its moanful airs). I don’t think I’m alone in this betwixt and between frame of mind—perhaps you feel it as well? A newly arrived year carrying both hope and the clamour of the known (and unknown)?

Walter Wangerin knows about this duality as he discloses his confession:

I love you. But I do homage to Herod.

I love you. But I seek the advantage of another king.

I love you, Lord Jesus. But I spend my days, my allegiance and my energies on the laws and the approvals of this visible kingdom.

King Jesus, come! Come as King to me. Batter my heart. (Walter Wangerin, Preparing For Jesus).

My prayer for this new year:

“Yes, Lord, please ‘batter my heart’ and mold it by your perfect and creative design. Make in me an integrated heart which allows Your light to shine out of my eyes. May this new celestial voyage be shaped by a constancy of faith that You desire to create in my heart.”